This year I turn 45 😬 and I finally feel I’ve come of age. I finally feel I’ve accepted the person inside. I’ve pretty much accepted the person outside – I’d still like to lose a few kilos, but I’m healthy and strong, and I know that’s the most important thing. I’ve still got a little way to go to accepting that I’ll be 45, but I’ve got a couple of months to get there. 😉
Turning 21 was the typical highlight in my life it is most young adults. I was ‘grown up’ now! That year I graduated from Uni, and began my first job as a sparkly-eyed, eager educator. I moved out of home and was ready to take on the world!
Turning 30 was liberating as I let go of many of the insecurities I had in my 20s. I had recently become a mother, and even though I celebrated this life event, I did experience post-natal depression, but had come through that challenge. I felt like I’d matured and was ready for the next stage of my life.
Turning 40 was challenging, as the year prior to my 40th birthday, I was probably at my lowest. I was recovering from a serious bout of depression. I’d started to gain weight and my anxiety was at its peak. I was struggling with self-image and self-esteem. I had to find my voice and learn how to express myself. I had to learn to forgive myself when I made mistakes and that it was okay to not be ‘perfect’ – that in fact, there is no such thing as perfection. I had to realise that my self-worth was not reliant on what other people thought of me - that it came from within. However over the past five years I’ve worked through many of my inner demons and feel I’m finally growing into the best version of myself that I can be.
So, turning 45 is my coming of age. I’m happy with how far I’ve come on my journey. I’m happy with where, and who, I am. I’m happy with what I’ve accomplished in all areas of my life. I’m happy with the direction I’m heading. I’m happy that I know there is so much more I have to give. I’m happy that I know I can achieve great things in the future. I’m happy!
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